Since March I’ve been living in Warsaw, Poland. It’s not my first stay in the country, but this time I have no plans to return to Northern California permanently. The process it took me to get here lasted roughly 5 years. I didn’t think I would leave my job at first, but the things I experienced made me realize that I’d be happier here, 5,851 miles from home.
The 9 to Five Jive
I finished college in 5 years with an undergrad degree in history. A history degree isn’t worth much by itself so I decided to get a masters degree in library and information science, which took another two years. Fate and opportunity were on my side since a full-time position was open at the world-class library and archive where I worked, right as I was approaching graduation. I applied for the job and got hired at $55k per year two weeks before I graduated. Working full time was both a positive and a negative experience for me.
The positive aspects were getting a salary (and paying off $20k in student loans), health benefits, retirement plan (growing my retirement investments to $150k in 5 years), free gym, learning a lot about history, working with my dad, meeting and working with really intelligent and accomplished people (a four-star admiral, medal of honor winner, 3 secretaries of state, historians, economists, and others).
The negative aspects were having to be at work from 8 to 5 every weekday, a maximum of 20-25 vacation days annually (not counting national holidays), incremental salary increases not tied to performance (~2.5% annually, culminating at $70k in my 6th year), office politics and a static hierarchy, boring and often unnecessary meetings, and the monotony of knowing you can’t get ahead based on your actions but only from the arbitrary actions of others.
Poland
My parents are Polish, but I’m a first generation American, born in Northern California, not far from San Francisco. My first trip to Poland was in 1990 for a month and then again in 1992 when our family moved to Poland for 18 months as part of my dad’s work. That long stay was one of the most formative experiences of my life. I remember how different everything seemed, from the architecture (mix of classic and communist), the lack of things I took for granted in the U.S. (McDonald’s and Philadelphia Cream Cheese didn’t show up until 1993), and the close-knit family atmosphere, even with close-friends who weren’t blood relatives but were still called “aunt” or “uncle”.
I visited Poland numerous times after that, mostly for 2-3 weeks at a time, with a 6-week stay in Kraków in 2007 during a study abroad program where I studied the Polish language, history and culture. I spent another 5 weeks in Poland in 2010 where I volunteered at the Warsaw Uprising Museum and another 3 weeks in Warsaw in late 2011.
Every visit to Poland was filled with new sights, sounds, tastes and emotions. I grew to really like the variety of Polish beer (there has been a micro-brewing trend in Poland in recent years, one of my favorite bars nearby has 57 taps and even more bottles). Polish women are also among the most beautiful in the world. There’s surely a genetic predisposition for me, but much has been written about how Eastern European women take better care of themselves physically and are more feminine than their North American counterparts.
In mid-2012 I had reached a crossroads in my life, deciding that I wanted to explore the possibility of getting a PhD in history and following that up with a 6-month stay in Poland. At work things were stagnant as we had no director at the top of our organization and it would end up being another year before someone was finally hired. I requested and was granted an unpaid leave of absence.
Fortunately the work I was doing was based on an annual project which I had recently finished, the rest of my work could be distributed amongst co-workers and I’d have ample time to work on the next project when I returned in January, 2013. The time I spent in Poland was partly focused on PhD research, but also on improving my Polish, getting to know my family here, making new friends and getting a feel for what living long-term in the country was like.
I visited Poland one more time before my current stay, in September, 2013. This visit was mainly to finalize paperwork related to my PhD and to take a break from work which had become an emotional drain. Staying for only 4 weeks was way too little for me, since just adjusting to the time difference (9 hours ahead in Poland) usually takes me two weeks or more. I made the decision to return to Poland for another long stint. I tried suggesting to my new boss that I could spend three months at a time in Poland and then California, in between big projects, but he didn’t go for it and I’m glad.
The Manosphere and Day Game
I’ve written previously about how I came across game and related subjects. Thanks to Roosh and other members of the “Manosphere”, my eyes were opened to what I was doing wrong with women (being very needy and not approaching at all), which started my journey of massive self-improvement. I had already been introduced to different strategies for personal growth through my fraternity (Sigma Chi) in college, but I was still handicapping myself by not pushing the boundaries of what was possible. I inhaled hundreds of articles on game, grooming, weight lifting, the sexual marketplace, location independent living, travel, etc. but I still wasn’t having success with women or making big changes.
The next turning point was the aforementioned, 6 months in Poland. In August of 2012 I came across the concept of Day Game, basically meeting and attracting women anywhere outside of a bar/club environment. Thanks to viewing the “Date Against the Machine” and “Daygame Blueprint” products (props to Andy Yosha and Tom Torero especially) I began approaching dozens of women in a matter of weeks and had met a beautiful Polish blonde whom I dated for the rest of my stay.
The funny thing about “swallowing the red pill” (a Matrix-inspired analogy about opening your eyes to how socio-sexual dynamics really work) is that your priorities shift dramatically, but the process can take some time as you adjust to the new realities you have been exposed to. Once I realized that I could get a pretty girlfriend with some effort, I wasn’t satisfied to “settle down” like I thought I wanted to in my “blue pill” days.
Since learning game, all of the interactions and “mini relationships” I’ve been in, have taught me a ton about who I am and the type of people that I want in my life. At this stage I’m content to date non-exclusively, while keeping my eyes open to the qualities I want in a woman if I decide to get married.
Leaving California for Poland
In late 2013 I finally decided to take the plunge and move to Poland. I knew that working on a PhD wasn’t something I could commit to while also working full-time. Beyond studying I knew that it was time for a change in my life. My experiences dating in both California and Poland made it clear that the type of women I was after were to be found in far greater numbers in Eastern Europe (though one foxy chick in Palo Alto showed me that those type of women can still be found stateside).
I also knew that I wanted to try my hand at earning income through the internet. Its been an eye-opening experience to see what it really takes, but now that I’m not working in an office, I have time to explore what’s possible. I’ve come to recognize that creating meaningful content that can help people change their life is a cornerstone of making money in this space. What the future holds remains to be seen, but I can envision some type of e-book in the future that’s a case study of how to relocate from North America to Poland.
Currently I’m focused on my PhD, developing this site and another one related to history, while enjoying life in Europe. A big plus of living here is the freedom to make short trips to other countries in the area or within Poland itself. A few weeks ago I was in Bucharest, Romania and last week I was at a conference in Lublin, a two-hour train ride south-east of Warsaw.
In future posts I’ll elaborate on the steps I took to make the move to Poland, including logistics and money, as well as some of the challenges of transitioning to my new lifestyle.
Thanks for reading this through to the end. It’s a new post-length record for me at 1500 words, hopefully you learned something new or were inspired to reflect on changes you are considering in your life.
If you have any questions or want to share your thoughts, please do in the comments below.
