Errol Flynn, an original player.
In the past few weeks I’ve started to take a real hard and critical look at how I meet women. I wasn’t satisfied with the number and caliber of women that I was meeting and dating and decided I needed to make dramatic changes.
Be a player not a pickup artist.
Although I learned a lot about game through the London PUA/daygame scene, I’ve realized that a lot of what I learned is no longer helping me and in fact may be holding me back. This article is my first attempt to illustrate what I’m changing and why its working better for me.
I think PUA’s have their place in the discussion of game, but its foolish to think that being a PUA is synonymous with being a player who does well with women. Believe it or not there are PUAs who sell products and bootcamps who do not get laid very much. Other PUAs are very good at meeting and bedding women, but that doesn’t mean they are great teachers or examples to follow.
I’ve stopped reading all game advice and watching videos, with the exception of Good Looking Loser. Having listened to the GLL podcasts, particularly those with Chris and Scotty, I’ve come to see that I’ve been doing things wrong and wasting a lot of time, failing to appropriately screen for girls who were really into me.
A radical concept, approach from the front.
This may seem like obvious advice, but you’d be surprised how this “technique” is virtually absent in daygame circles.
The standard way to approach women on the street (at least among London daygamers) is the “Yad” stop, popularized by Yad, a PUA. That stop involves jogging alongside and in front of a walking girl, making a semi-circle, gauging the appropriate distance and stopping her with your outstretched hand(s). Besides subcommunicating neediness by “chasing” her, the Yad stop, at least in Warsaw, has been used to death. Thousands upon thousands of women have been approached this way, sometimes multiple times, and its gotten old as hell.
Time for something new.
For all that’s been written about men having dominant body language, it’s pretty shocking that the very basic “method” of simply stopping a girl head on, is hardly mentioned. Actually the only time I’ve heard it discussed (other than GLL) is to discourage it, suggesting that its better to let a girl walk past you and then catch up to her, since it’ll seem like you thought about it for a moment to decide to talk to her, or some such bullshit.
Since I’ve been daygaming for almost 3 years, and the Yad stop has been my main technique for stopping a girl, transitioning to stopping from the front has been refreshing and successful. Its bold to see a girl, stand in front of her and stop her in her tracks. Combined with strong eye contact, it’s a great way to meet women.
After having talked to about 1,500 girls on the streets over the last several years, trying this has been an excellent way to change things up and be clear about my intent from the start. With the girl radar that I’ve developed, I don’t need to let a girl walk past me only to artificially create an “aha!” moment and chase after her like a puppy.
Be spontaneous, be a man.
Doing this will increase your spontaneity with women, because you can literally do it at a moment’s notice. As soon as a girl walk out of a store, off an escalator, arounda a corner, BOOM, “Hey hold on a sec…I just noticed you and I think you look pretty…My name is Nick” [outstretched hand]. It’s really not much more complicated than this in the beginning.
It’s inevitable that you’ll notice a girl who is walking in another direction or has already passed you before you stop her head on. In these situations of course you can try another approach, perhaps from the side, the Yad or waiting until she stops moving.
The beauty of the front stop is that its direct, it works, the girl sees you coming and if she’s not interested you can move on in thirty seconds or less.
Approaching from the front is a more direct and powerful way to find those women who are down for you and filter out those that aren’t.
